Who Collars Who?
by Aille
Summary: Hermione and someone else are shopping in a Muggle store. (When the raiting for this goes higher, I will be moving it to only my web-page & Yahoo group)
1. Muggle Shops and New Toys

**CLASSIFICATION**: PG-13 Just because of where they are shopping, however, NC-17 later on.  
**SUMMARY**: Hermione and someone else are shopping in a Muggle store.  
**DISCLAIMER**: I don't own them... She does *points to JKR* and I am making no money from this, I'm just enjoying sharing some of my own crazy ideas.  
**AUTHORS NOTE**: I don't have a beta reader right now... so I kept this chapter short. However, I have lots more to send out. Can anyone help? Oh, and I got this idea from a picture I saw. Don't ask me why my brain did this...  


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**Chapter One  
Muggle Shops and New Toys**

  
  
All I could think as I was being dragged down the street by the woman in front of me was 'Why did she have to go to Muggle London in the first place? As a rule of thumb, I avoid this place as much as possible, and she knows this. There just isn't anything here that holds my interest. Right now I could be back at the school with my lover, but no... the first chance he and I would get to be alone in weeks, and she has to go shopping.'  
  
As if she could since what I was thinking, she calls to me over her shoulder while giving my arm a yank. "Come on, you'll love this place. Not to far now."  
  
"Alright, alright Hermione." I said while quickening my steps so she wasn't exactly dragging me along any more.  
  
I noticed a few of the Muggles giving us amused looks and I can hear the thoughts, 'don't they make a cute couple'. BAH, little do they know. Then again, many people, Wizards and Muggles a like often mistake us for a couple, and I just don't have the energy to correct them any more.  
  
It's just that best friends enjoy doing things together, and it helps that both of our lovers are best friends too. So when Hermione suggested that today should be used for shopping, they jumped on it. Of course Hermione said I had to come with her and not him, because we just had to finish our Christmas shopping. Not that I've paid attention to anything that we've done today, all I've thought about is him.  
  
It would just shock everyone if I went up and kissed him though, and it would be so worth it. At least to stop all the questions. However, neither Hermione nor I can have any sign of public affection with our lovers. That's just what we get for falling in love with our teachers.  
  
Oh I know consent wise, both of us are old enough to be with whom ever we want, but it would be frond upon. Both of them are eighteen years older than us. It's the fact that they are our teachers that everyone would have a problem with. But to Hermione and I, that just doesn't matter any more.  
  
"Hey... HEY!"  
  
I shake myself out of my inward thoughts and realize we've stopped. "Are we there yet?" I ask impatiently. I just want to get back to the school.  
  
"Yes, we're here, and I've asked you the same question five times now." Oh shite, she sounds miffed at me, better look like I know what I'm talking about.  
  
"Which would look better, the light blue, or the lilac?"  
  
That, I took as my clue to take a better look around me. "Oh No...." Shit, did I say that out loud... I did crap, where the hell has she taken me?  
  
In one hand, I can see this pair of handcuffs with light blue fur around the cuffs, and in the other hand, a pair with lilac fur. Behind her is this table with a number of other pairs with various colors.  
  
"Oh no?" She's looking at me like I better explain myself quickly, so I blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.  
  
"Wouldn't green be better? I mean..." I stumble as she glares at me, "it would match his eyes..."  
  
Inwardly I breath a deep sigh of relief as she smiles and then turns to look though the selection on the table, forgetting about me again for the moment.  
  
"Hermione..." I start.  
  
"Mmm" Ok, so she's not paying attention at all.  
  
"I'm going to take a look around, alright?"  
  
She just waves me off with a flick of her hand as she bends over to examine a couple of different pairs.  
  
As I walk around the store, every so often stopping to look at something or to look back to see if she's done yet, I marvel at the things around me. Did Muggles really wear this stuff? I mean, it's not even dragon's hide, but leather.  
  
OMG, this is just too weird. That thing over there on the front counter, what was it called again, a Buzzer? There is no way in Hell I'd be putting that up any where. Any way, he's much better.  
  
Just as I was turning around to tell Hermione to hurry up and make her choice, I saw IT. I knew right then that she was right, I loved this place.  
  
I could almost feel the ideas forming in my mind as I reached over to pick it up. 


	2. Snow Storms and Missed Dinner

**TITLE**: Who Collars Who - Chapter 2/?  
**CHAPTER**: Snow Storms and Missed Dinner  
**AUTHOR**: Kenraie  
**E-MAIL**: kenraie@earthlink.net  
**PAIRING**: Hermione/Remus, Harry/Sirius  
**SERIES**: Yes  
**ARCHIVE**: Ask first.  
**CLASSIFICATION**: PG13 for now  
**SUMMARY**: Jealous!Sirius and Reasonable!Remus deal with Missing!Harry and Hermione  
**DISCLAIMER**: I don't own them... She does *points to JKR* and I am making no money from this, I'm just enjoying sharing some of my own crazy ideas.  
**AUTHORS NOTE**: A GREAT BIG THANK YOU goes out to my WONDERFUL Beta reader Coqui. I wouldn't have been able to finish this chapter without you. (hugs)  
  


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Sirius paced in front of the fire, stopping every so often to throw a look in the direction of the man sitting comfortably in an arm chair reading a book and sipping tea. After his most recent pass by the vacant chair next to the man, he stopped and sank into it. "How can you be so calm Moony?"  
  
"Because I trust both of them," Remus said without even looking up from his book.  
  
"But they weren't in Hogsmeade!"  
  
Sighing, Remus put down his book to face the conversation he had been avoiding since they had returned an hour ago. "Look Padfoot, they're seventeen, they're in seventh year here, it's a Saturday, and it's a Hogsmeade weekend. No wonder they escaped from us for a few hours. They need to finish their Christmas shopping any way. Ok, so they forgot about lunch, but you know what they're like. They probably got caught up in some store." Looking at his friend's glowering face. "It's not like they're going to start shagging each other. They'll be back for dinner. You can interrogate them then."  
  
"Your right, it's a *Hogsmeade* weekend. However, They. Were. Not. In. Hogsmeade," Sirius ground out.  
  
"They probably used Floo powder to go to Diagon Alley. I was complaining about a book I couldn't find here and I bet Hermione went to look for it." Taking a sip of his tea, Remus picked up his book and started reading again, blocking out Sirius' sputtering.  
  
Sirius sprang out of his chair and started pacing in front of the fire again. Every so often looking over at Remus and muttering under his breath things like 'when he gets back here...' and 'this is all her fault...'  
  


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I hear her squeak as we step out of the building we just landed in, the soot from the fireplace still clinging to the bottom of our robes. I take a look to see what the fuss is about and groan.  
  
"Well, looks like we're walking." I try to sound cheerful as we watch the last carriage disappear around the bend. The snow that had been falling in Muggle London when we left seemed to be falling even more heavily here. Muttering something under my breath about the witch in Diagon Alley insisting on having pictures taken with me, Hermione chuckles.  
  
"Don't think that's entirely possible... but you're right, she was slimier than Snape." I just throw her a glare.  
  
I watch her square her shoulders as if heading to battle and chuckle inwardly as she says, "Come on, it's a good half hour walk, at least, in this weather." I know her thoughts are running along the same lines mine are, 'they're going to kill us.'  
  
As we trudge up towards the castle, the snow starting to fall even thicker around us so that we're walking in snow up to our calves, the bags I'm carrying seem to get heavier and heavier by the minute. Thinking to myself as we walked, 'I was doing great until we hit that store that Hermione just *had* to go to. Where I found the perfect gift for him. Then it was like something broke within me and instead of Mione pulling me into shops, it was me pulling her.'  
  
"I'm sorry Mione." I blurt out. "I know we're late because of me. We could have been done an hour ago if I hadn't wanted to find that sweater."  
  
"It's not your fault, we just lost track of time." I know she's trying to brush it off, but before I can say anything back, my stomach decided to make itself heard.  
  
Giggling, she started, "I told you, we should have stopped for lun..." she trailed off and stopped dead on the trail. "Oh. My. God! Harry... lunch!" Her eyes had gotten almost as large as Dobby's as she turned to look at me.  
  
Then it hit me and letting go of my bags, I sunk down to sit in the snow. "They're going to kill us Mione." I grown. "How could we have forgotten?"  
  
Hermione sat down beside me, letting go of her own bags. Covering her head with her arms. "We could have had them all to ourselves..."  
  
"No students coming to ask questions..." I chime in.  
  
For about ten minutes we both just sat there in mild shock, saying things like 'how could we have forgotten' and 'they're going to kill us'. Then my stomach decided to speak up again.  
  
Hermione and I locked our eyes again and mouthed, 'we're late for dinner' and started scrambling to pick up our bags.  
  
"Come on..." I spit out, and start towards the castle, or at least, hope towards the castle, as fast as I can go, with Hermione close behind. The sky had grown completely dark in the time we had spent lollygagging, and we could barely see two feet ahead of ourselves because of the snow.  
  


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He looked up at the enchanted ceiling, cursed inwardly and then looked back to the Gryffindor table. Muttering under his breath, while pushing his untouched food around his plate, he turned to look at Remus. "Said they would be back for dinner, not to worry. Look!" He gestured towards the dealing, which showed a very dark sky full of snow, which had been getting heaver by the minute.  
  
"I know what I said." Remus growled back. He had been growing increasingly edgy over the past hour. Pushing his barely touched plate away from himself, he said, "I'm going to look for them."  
  
"First smart thing you've said all day." Sirius growled under his breath, placing his fork back on his plate. "Come on," He said while pushing himself away from the table, "we've wasted enough time already to your wanting to wait."  
  
"Padfoot..."  
  
"What?" He snapped back.  
  
"Sit down, we can't just run out of here."  
  
"And why the bloody hell not?"  
  
"One, you're drawing a scene. Two, this is not the first time students have been late getting back from Hogsmeade. Three, people don't know we're seeing them." Remus said quietly as he ticked them off on his fingers. "And four, the slimy git is watching us like a hawk again."  
  
After giving Snape a death glare he turned back to Remus, "However, this is *my Harry* we're talking about here. He just can't go wandering off with Voldemort out there."  
  
"And Hermione." Remus sighed. "However, we can not just go rushing out there." Looking Sirius square in the eye. "What we can do though, is you can go get our cloaks and I will talk to Albus. At least I can make a reasonable argument as to why *we* are the ones to go look for them."  
  
Looking slightly dejected at Remus' reasoning, he huffed, "All right then. Now, I'm going to get our cloaks and I'll meet you in the front hall." Standing up all the way, he strode out of the hall, looking as if he had an angry cloud surrounding him.  
  
Remus stayed there for a moment shaking his head at his friend, then stood up and moved over to the Headmaster.  
  
"What was that all about?" Dumbledore asked with a twinkle in his eyes.  
  
"Just Sirius playing over protective godfather again..."  
  


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"Harry!"  
  
"What?" I snapped.  
  
"We're lost, just admit it. We should have been there at least twenty minutes ago."  
  
"We. Are. Not. Lost." She had been getting on my nerves for the past fifteen minutes.  
  
"Then where in the nine gates of bloody hell are we?" She growls at me.  
  
This stops me. I know we're lost, I know I got us lost, but I just don't want to admit it. "Right here?" I give her my best 'I know what I'm talking about' look.  
  
Whatever reaction I had been expecting, it wasn't the one I got. She took one look at me and then burst out laughing. "The last time I listened to that line Mr. Harry Potter, you were trying to hook me up with Ron."  
  
I bite my lower lip and try and look innocent. "Well, you never told me you were seeing Remus... and you know Ron's feelings for you... I thought I was doing a good thing."  
  
She blushed a bright red, that I could see in the wand light. "Yeah, well you never told us about Sirius."  
  
It was my turn to blush. "I... I..."  
  
"You were scared what our reaction would be." She cut though my stammering with that simple statement.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Oh Harry." She sounded exasperated. "You should have known better." With that she took the few steps that were between us, and gave me a big hug. "Now come on you fool of a Gryffindor. Try that four-point spell again. I'm cold!"  
  
Laughing, I whisper '_Point Me_' to my wand and watch it spin. "That way." I point to our left and then groan, realizing where I'm pointing. "The bloody forest."  
  
"How is it that we *always* end up in the Forbidden Forest?" she moans beside me. 


End file.
